Just Stay
by Geek in the Purple
Summary: "When you left me on that beach the pain in my spine was intense and almost unbearable; But, you know what's the funniest thing?" I laugh ironically, "What hurt me more that day was not the bullet in my back." / Written from Charles POV. Spoilers of DOFP. Retake of the plane scene


_A/N: I'm aware this is not good and it didn't come as I expected, but still enjoy and leave a comment, please?_

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My gaze, tenacious and resentful, nails in the figure in front of me, while my hand tightly grips the arm of the couch where I am sitting. So close and yet so far at the same time, Erik seems to ignore my presence when I cannot even take my eyes off him. For a single moment, I would love to have my powers to find out what he's thinking. Does he feel guilty? Or the same hate runs through his veins?

"How did you lose them?" he asks interrupting my thoughts, but yet he doesn't have the guts to face me.

"The treatment for my spine affects my DNA," I reply bitterly.

"You sacrificed your powers so you could walk?" Finally he decides to look at me. I can see the shock on his face assuming things that are unknown to him.

"I sacrificed my powers so I can sleep." I look down disappointed by his mere accusation. "What do you know about it?" He knows nothing of my life.

"I've lost my fair share," he dares to answer.

Inevitably a skeptical laugh escapes my control, misjudging his words. "Dry your eyes, Erik," I say looking back at him, "It doesn't justify what you've done."

"You've no idea what I've done."

"I know that you took the things that mean the most to me," I accuse feeling the tears in my eyes.

"Well maybe you should have fought harder for them," Erik says, raising his voice slightly and putting his finger on the sore spot again.

The anger fills me and my muscles tense. I cannot take it anymore. "If you want to fight Erik, I will give you a fight!" I get up from my seat and he mimics my movements.

"Sit down!" I hear Logan say, but all my attention is focused on Erik, who stares at me with outstretched arms, inviting me to move forward.

"Let him come," Erik whispers. He wants this, as if he had been waiting for it.

I lunge at him and hit him in the chest hard. "You abandoned me! You took her away, and you abandoned me!" I scream in anger and hatred.

He, without taking his eyes from mine, begins to list the names of those who are gone. "Angel, Azazel," his fists tightly closed, and unconsciously, their powers begin to wreak havoc on the plane. "Emma, Banshee ... Brothers and sisters, mutants, all dead. Many others, victims of experiments, slaughtered." I lose my balance by the turbulences that his powers are causing and I fall into the couch where I was before. "We were supposed to protect them! Where were you, Charles?" Every word he utters causes the plane to vibrate in tension. "Where were you when your people needed you!? Hiding! You and Hank, feeling different from what you are! You abandoned us all!"

His last words, in a calmer but equally bitter tone, echo in my head, knowing that they are true. However, for me, this conversation, or better discussion, is no longer about our friends or about humans and wars. It goes much further than that, but it seems that Erik cannot see it.

He does not understand what I'm trying to convey. He was never able to even imagine it. He never realized that the day my mind touched his, a part of me stayed with him.

I needed him more than anything, and still he left me to my fate lying on that beach. He is the one to blame for my current situation and I'm not talking about the fateful bullet that ended in my spine.

Despite the pain I start to feel in my legs, I get up and decide that the conversation is not over. I know the effect of the serum is just starting to fade and gradually I sense the usual tingling travelling from my toes up my legs to my hip.

I could walk away quietly to take the dose I need and ignore this feeling that has been growing inside me for too long. But not this time. I will show him what he's not able to comprehend.

"You do not understand, do you?" I ask rhetorically and calmer now. I look down and shake my head feeling the tears I cannot hold back any longer. I lift my eyes and mingle them with his and, although I don't have my powers, I feel his anger fading, while Hank recovers the control of the plane.

"You've never understood it," I repeat seeing the confusion on his face. "I needed you Erik," I confess softly stepping towards him. "I needed you and you were not there! You left me!" Again I raise my voice and I accompany my words with a blow of my fist against his chest. More vulnerable than ever, I allow myself to open my hand and feel the beating of his pounding heart.

Erik does not lose sight of my moves and he observes me with sadness. He's finally seeing what he wasn't able to see before, though his expression tells me that his feelings aren't reciprocated.

"You left me on that beach," I continue, not caring that my speech is being listened by Logan or Hank. I just don't give a shit anymore. "The pain in my spine was intense and almost unbearable; a pain that you caused and yet you left. But, you know what's the funniest thing?" I laugh ironically, "What hurt me more that day was not the bullet in my back. It was my heart breaking into a thousand pieces when you disappeared. That day I felt how you took a part of me with you, and you know what? It was never returned." I step back, letting my hand slide down his chest until I don't feel his heart anymore. With my gaze fixed on his melancholy eyes, now full of understanding and guilt, I speak my last words. "You have no idea."

I conclude my confession. Now I know he can understand my pain, although he doesn't share it. I turn to walk away from him, not caring that others have witnessed this conversation.

I almost can't feel my legs and I'm beginning to hear voices in my head. I need serum immediately.

"Charles," Erik whispers grabbing my arm to stop my steps.

"Do not touch me," I ordered, shaking off his hand and releasing my arm.

I don't even look back. I start walking and after a couple of steps, I feel my knees wobble. I react quickly and I support myself against the side of the plane, near the rear cabin.

I remain in that position for a few seconds while I try hard to regain control of my body. I slowly take a couple more steps, but the pain in my hip and the numbness in my legs are holding me back. I rest my back on the wall of the plane and breathe deeply to put myself together.

"Charles, let me help you," Erik suggests getting closer.

"I don't need your help," I say proudly.

The thoughts of others begin to resurface in my mind, attacking me like sharp swords. I can feel Hank's concern and Logan's confusion, but above all I feel Erik's pain; there's pain in him and something else that I cannot get to define.

_Please let me help you._

I hear his voice in my mind so clearly that it seems he just said the words. I reject his help and again I attempt to regain control over my legs. It's stupid. I am aware that I will not be able to take another step and at any moment my legs will give in and I will fall.

I turn my gaze to Erik, who doesn't take his gray eyes off me. I hate feeling so vulnerable, and even more after what just happened, but I find myself forced to ask for help.

_Help me_, I whisper into his mind.

Instantly he's at my side, sliding his hand down my back to hold me. I round his neck with my arm and slowly we walk towards the back of the plane. Erik helps me to sit in one of the seats.

"I need the serum," I demand.

"Why do you do this to you?" he asks without taking his gaze from mine.

"Just give me the serum. It's in the bag against the wall there," I indicate.

Erik looks at it and I feel how the doubts invade his mind.

"Erik, please ..." I beg, bringing my hands to my temples and pushing hard to relieve the pain.

He looks at me and finally picks the bag from the floor and opens it.

"The black box. Give it to me," I explain. He just does what I ask.

Once in my hands, I open the little box where the serum is already in syringes with small controlled doses made by Hank. I roll up my blue shirt sleeves and I start to pump blood from my left arm clenching my fist again and again. Finally, among all the bruises, I manage to distinguish the vein. My hand trembles when I pick up the syringe and place the tip of the needle on my arm.

_Please..._

I hear Erik's voice projected inside my mind. I raise my eyes and there he is, motionless, watching me with tears in her eyes. He crouches and rests his hand on my fist.

_I'm sorry Charles._

He's trying hard to project his thoughts in my mind, but I do not want them. I do not want him in my head right now.

"Stop!" I yell.

_Don't do this,_ he begs heartily. For the first time in years, I see the pure sincerity in his words, but I no longer need it.

_This is none of your business. Just leave, like you did before_, I insist.

His answer comes immediately. He forces me to open my hand and he intertwines his fingers with mine. With force, I feel Erik begin to project the memory of one of our chess games.

"Stop projecting!" I ask out loud to no avail. I no longer have the same control I had over my powers a few years ago, and I am unable to block him when I'm this weak.

I see the two of us laughing over the outcome of a game of chess. The fourth that afternoon and the fourth win for me. I feel the happiness that memory gives to Erik. It travels through my body and invades my mind. There's happiness and again, something I'm not able to decipher, until, suddenly, a wave of emotions floods me and makes my trembling hand to drop the syringe.

My gaze fixes on Erik, who observes me with a half-smile forming on his lips. Finally I get to recognize that feeling that I couldn't decode before. Exactly the same feeling that has haunted me for years. Love.

My eyes fill with tears again and I slowly watch as Erik begins to lean towards me, stopping just a few inches from my lips. He studies each feature that makes me who I am. I feel how his heart admires every corner his eyes can reach. Then her gaze lands in mine expectantly.

In those pale eyes I discover more than I have ever imagined. I finally find the missing piece that completes me; the piece that years ago I gave him without me even knowing it.

All of a sudden I feel his lips against mine; soft but strong at the same time, just how I imagined them, but even better. Our minds tangle and I concentrate all my efforts to amplify our emotions and unify them so he can feel what I'm feeling.

Our mouths begin to battle warmly and my hands instinctively move to sink in his hair to draw him closer to me. I want to drink from his mouth and make his wishes cloud my senses to feel him; just him.

The peace that fills me is the culmination of all the hided feelings and the non-spoken words. It's the reconciliation of two minds that have been united long ago and needed each other to survive.

_Charles, forgive me, please forgive me,_ Erik repeats over and over again in his mind as we kiss passionately as if our life depends on it.

His hands cup my face and for the first time in many years I forget the voices in my head and the pain in my spine. My lips dance along his. I'm breathless and my heart is racing. I almost cannot believe this is happening.

When we lack of air, he rests his forehead against mine and we look at each other trying to control our breathing.

"I'm sorry," he repeats. "I never thought you could feel the same," he confesses.

"I think I've felt it since I saved your life that day."

"Why didn't you say anything?" he asks surprised.

"I never wanted to accept it. I guess I was scared," I admit.

"Fear always stops us from doing the things we want most."

"Us?" I ask wanting to know more.

"I've never wanted to lose you, but..." Erik explains and wiping away my tears with his hand.

"But?"

"I guess things didn't go as expected," he confesses disappointed.

_That can change..._ I whisper hopefully in his mind. He smiles. I didn't remember how much I missed that perfect smile I so often dreamed about when I went to sleep.

"You've always had a blind faith in me; even after all I've done to you. I don't understand, "he says, looking down.

"I explained it once," I muttered placing my hand on her chin and making him look me in the eye. "There's good in you Erik. You're not all anger and hatred. You have passion and I know you can get to do great things, if you decide to stay."

I wish with all my heart that this could work. I can't imagine myself away from him again, much less when now I can have him the way I've always dreamed. I am aware of the obstacles along the way, but I'm confident that we can do it if we stay together

_I want to stay..._ he mumbles, _because of you and because I wouldn't bear not being able to kiss those lips again._

His words make me smile and I lean forward to capture his lips again. We kiss gently and slowly and I can't help but think that this may be the beginning of a great adventure.


End file.
